Trends and Resolutions

     Over the last few years, I have noticed a trend happening.  I doubt others would see it.  They would probably only see my personal fears or tell me that it's all in my head.  Well...real or imaginary, I still have to deal with it, right?  So this trend, as I see it, works like this - Women will talk to me about their personal lives, about how the boyfriend isn't paying enough attention anymore or how the hubby has been cheating or whatever.  Now me...I try to help.  I offer suggestions on what to try, what to say...things like that.  I'm their best friend when the shit is hitting the fan.  But when things start to turn around, when things start to get better...well, then suddenly they don't want to talk to me or be seen with me.  It happened with 2 different women I knew from a previous job and it's happened with various women throughout my years.  Why is it that I am only good enough to talk to when the chips are down?  Every time it happens I say to myself that it's the last time...that from now on I will be like all the other guys cuz then women would at least talk to me.  But I can't do it...it's just not in me.  I'm the nice guy.  And nice guys always finish last IF they finish at all.

     The second part of this lil rant of mine is about resolutions.  It's almost the new year and everyone makes resolutions and finally, after many a year, I will too.  But first, a little background to help understand my resolution.  Recently someone made the statement that "art is essentially useless".  This has bothered me since I first read that statement.  A trusted friend at work told me I should just forget about it.  Unfortunately for me, it's just one of those things that sticks in my craw.  See, it works like this - if art is useless, then, by extension, the artist is useless.  So in essence this person is telling me that I am useless.  What makes it hurt even worse is that this is coming from the very person who inspired me to become an artist in the first place.  Thus we come to my resolution for the new year.  Since I am indirectly being told that I am useless, my resolution is to never again create any art.  No more drawing or painting or coloring.  Nothing artistic or creative in any way.

     When your Muse tells you you're useless...then it is time to stop.